You Can Look But You Can't Touch Baby Suri!

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have invited the Beckhams to be the next celebrity couple to meet baby Suri. However, there have been some pretty strict guidelines issued to Vic and David if they want to see the golden child. First and foremost, NO TOUCHING! Because babies obviously hate cuddling or affection in any way, shape or form. So, no "loving" the baby. We got it, Tom! Rule numero dos, no cooing or baby voices in front of Suri. In other words, speak in an angry, threatening tone at all times. Well, ok, we're overreacting. But seriously, WTF? We all know Cruise is a nutbag but come oooon. You would think this kid is the second coming of God...or in Tom's case...the King Alien? Whatevs. Katie, our only advice is to take your baby and run. Run far, far away.
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